Bulls**t by Any Other Name

Lies and platitudes we tell ourselves (and others)

            “There’s always room for Jello.”

No there’s not. Not “always.” Jello is just like any other liquid and it’s just as filling. The people who make Jello would like you to believe it is a magic, mass-less, flavor bomb, but it ain’t so. If it was, how would the carrots and cabbage stay in suspension? And, since we’re on the subject, I also find it difficult to imagine just how hungry the originator must have been when he or she looked at orange Jello, looked at carrots and said, “Hey! They’re both orange; I’ll bet these would be good together.” By this logic a lime Jello and green tomato mix should be really yummy!

        “MacDonald’s is only about fast food.”

Technically, I suppose this is true, but conceptually, McDonalds is also symbolic of bland, mundane, ordinary “for the masses” retailing. I mean, the shakes will barely even melt, rather deteriorating into a sort of slimy, non-dairy, glop. Carried into other areas of American life, there are other non-food concepts which are “McDonalds.”

       People magazine, The National Inquirer, and in fact, every single type of checkout line reading material is/are McDonalds. Most on line quizzes touting your “genius” status if you can answer more than half of the 5th grade geography questions? McDonalds. Twitter, Pinterest, Snapchat? All McDonald’s, seeming to feed, but leaving you somehow unsatisfied. Jersey Shore, Real Housewives of (your town here), Big Brother, Survivor? All vicarious mental McDonald’s meals for those with no life. Worst of all? Fox News - claiming to be journalism while sandwiching massive slabs of loathsome, unhealthy, op-ed between very thin slices of actual factual reportage. On second thought, strike that last. Even McDonald’s food is more digestible that Faux News .

        “Good things come to those who wait.”

     Sometimes, possibly, but what this platitude slides right past is really the crux of its intent. If what you are waiting for is the result of planning, nurture and forethought, then many times gratification ensues. If, however, the waiting you engage in is, for example, the failure to address a medical issue, whether due to inability to pay, or “If I don’t see a doctor, then I won’t have to think about it” fatalism, then it is unlikely that your wait will result in anything good. In like manner if the wait involves taking no responsibility to educate yourself, or learn salable skills, then, like many in those towns in Kentucky and West Virginia filled with “out of work” miners who refuse to retrain, the only thing good to come is continued reliance on public assistance. The alternate version of this platitude is “The Lord will provide,” also a sop to those, too lazy, superstitious or stupid to act in their own behalf.

      “Trump’s “Wall” would stop most “illegal” immigration since Mexicans are the vast majority of undocumented immigrants.”

      This canard remains a favorite of some Trump sycophants who cling to a rapidly decreasing list of things promised which may still be “on the table.” This faint hope dims their view of the multitude of truly detestable actions and verbal attacks levied in all directions by this most non-presidential of presidents. Without a listing of the mountain of data available, there are several singularly inarguable considerations which apply.

1)The states with the largest percentage increases in influx of undocumented aliens as of 2016 are: Louisiana, Oregon, Virginia, Pennsylvania, and Massachusetts. Last time I looked, none of these abuts the northern Mexican border.

2) A significant portion of the current numbers of undocumented aliens entering are coming by air. It had better be a really, really, tall wall!

3) In the absence of any wall, the Obama administration did far more than any previous administration to reduce “illegal” immigration across the Mexican border. I only mention this because Trump derides Obama at every turn, discarding fact along the way.

4) When all immigrants are considered, several things jump out. First, as of 2016 India and China are now the top sources of “legal” immigration, with Mexico now third. Additionally, more of these immigrants (30% more!) than native born Americans hold college degrees.

5) Not "wall" specific, but indicative of the monumental ignorance of the man, Of the 1.4 million African immigrants who are 25 and older, 41% have a bachelor's degree, compared with 30% of all immigrants o f the same age range. (One recalls the "shithole" countries label placed on African nations in general.) Of the 19,000 U.S. immigrants from Norway — a country Trump told lawmakers is a "good" source of immigrants — fewer (38%) have college educations.