"I’m assuming that cows, like people and dogs, have varying degrees
of intelligence. So at some point there was a cow of superior advanced
intelligence running around a slaughterhouse somewhere that had figured out
what was going on. That death was imminent, and all their masters were not
benevolent nurturers but rather evil murderers luring them to their deaths. But
he couldn’t communicate this to the other cows because all the other cows were
of average cow intelligence—i.e., stupid. Maybe even the cow was smart enough
to know that he was just a cow and would never be able to impart the sense of
urgency needed to escape because cows are stupid. Must’ve been maddening. Also,
I wonder if we’d be less prone to eating beef if the noise a cow makes sounded
less like “moo” and more like “help.” Probably not. They’re delicious."
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