The Attaboy Award,
awarded to the person in the news (or elsewhere) with their head most firmly
implanted in their own excretory pore. If it were an Olympic event, we’d call
this maneuver the “Recto-cranial Inversion”
Today’s nominees are simply the easiest to pick from a host
of moronic individuals who should know better.
1. Fox
News
A collective “attaboy”
to Fox News for what has to be the most misleading campaign to whitewash a bad job
(Trump’s performances re: Covid19):
I submit several quotes from a myriad by Fox on-air hosts
and/or guests.
I also suggest a new slogan: “Faux News, Our heads so far up
Trump’s ass, we can see his uvula!”
Sean Hannity: Mr. Trump’s decision to restrict travel from
China and Europe would “go down as the single most consequential decision
in history.” (I’m just
speechless. Ever heard of Hiroshima?) – OR-
Hannity, March 9:
"This scaring the living hell out of people -- I see it, again, as like,
let's bludgeon Trump with this new hoax." But then, Hannity, March 18:
"By the way, this program has always taken the coronavirus seriously.
We've never called the virus a hoax."
(Pants on fire, Sean.)
Laura Ingraham: “A coronavirus,” she said on Feb. 25,
“that’s a new pathway for hitting President Trump.” (Wow, such a tiny
projectile and such a huge target. Piece of cake!)
Trish Regan: Went on
a rant about the “Coronavirus Impeachment Scam” on March 9, in which she
characterized the pandemic as “an attempt to demonize and destroy the
president, despite the virus originating halfway around the world.”
And: Pete Hegseth: “The more I learn about this, the less
there is to worry about.” (Apparently, he
hasn’t learned all that much, huh?)
Jeanine Pirro: “Mainstream-media doesn’t reflect reality.” (No
Ms. Pirro, your version of reality doesn’t reflect reality)
Ainsley Earhardt: “It’s actually the safest time to fly.”
(based on?)
2. Republican PA representative
Bob Brooks
Representative Brooks showed up to cast
his vote to accelerate “opening up” the state wearing an N95 protective ask. This
is top grade equipment then many Health Care professionals still haven’t a
sufficient supply of. He voted to ease up on social separation rules (in the interest
of bucks, of course). Why is he a nominee? First, he voted against the broader
interest of his constituents. Then he is posing for a photo op wearing this
high-tech mask for his own protection, but wait, as they say, there’s more, and
it’s the real reason I nominate this bumpkin.
A closer look reveals
several issues which make me ponder this guy’s ability to chew gum and urinate
at the same time:
Look at the mask. See the
dark metal clips under the Congressman’s chin? They should be over the bridge
of his nose. Note that under his chin is a wayward strap with no apparent purpose.
This is because this moron is wearing the mask upside down! I will allow that I
could be wrong if Brooks has the most hideous facial disfigurement ever. We know
he’s political damaged.
3. Jim Bakker and Sherrill
Sellman
We already know Bakker as a convicted fraud and ex-con. He
is now huckstering for all sorts of bullshit, (besides religion) off the wall, products,
generally survival food for the “end times”, which, apparently, will not affect
the home sites in the Ozarks for whose developers he also shills.
Sherrill Sellman,
styled as a “doctor” is in reality an “N.D.” not an M.D. A “naturopath”, she sells a silver colloidal
solution which she claims (falsely, by all real analysis) will cure all sorts
of things. She has been a semi-regular on Bakker’s absolutely execrable
television show for a while. She claims it as a panacea, and Bakker claims it
kills all VD. (I guess he brought a “little something” back, from his former cell
mate, Big Otto?)
As Covid19 began to popup in the news, Bakker
asked Shellman, on air, if her Health Max Nano-Silver Liquid would kill CoVid. She
assured the viewers that it would “kill any virus” and she would recommend its
use for Corona virus. It is noteworthy that Sherrill Sellman will also be glad to
conduct a personal “video consultation” with you for $175 per hour!
Here’s another
point of view from real doctors: For over
20 years, the FDA has been consistently clear: Silver doesn't work to combat
serious (or any) diseases. Over-the-counter drugs that contain colloidal silver
ingredients "are not recognized as safe and effective," it says.
According to the NIH, "Colloidal silver can be dangerous to your health."
In fact, silver is even more chemically non-reactive than Gold.
There is, however,
one thing colloidal silver can do for you! Continued ingestion, as Bakker and
Shellman recommend, can cause argyria, a permanent blue-gray discoloration of
your skin, eyes, internal organs, nails and gums. Hmmm!
The State of
Missouri has sued Bakker and Shellman and the product is no longer offered for
sale on his show, but he still has his head up his and, perhaps, “DR” Shellman’s
arse.
4. Donald J. Trump
Don’t give me that “What a surprise” bullshit; you had to see
thus coming. This is truly “low hanging fruit,” So I’ll skip the reams of CoVid19
mishandling since it’s well documented in previous blog posts and essentially every
other print outlet and refocus on the continuing effects of two other examples of
Trump’s disastrous and ill considered behavior.
The first, which I have addressed elsewhere, but
less recently, is the continuing negative impact on the average American family
of Trump’s ill-conceived tariff wars (Canada, China, Mexico and others). Ignoring the
global crippling effects of CoVid 19, the cost to the average American household
of these Tariffs has been about $850 annually. How much has China paid? (as
Trump brags that they will or do) Nada, Zip, Zero. Odd, that, just like the “wall”
and Mexico, huh? Now, how much have we,
the tax-paying body politic paid in a year with what was already a terrible deficit?
For starters: A
study published in fall 2019 in the Journal of Economic Perspectives found that
by December 2018, Trump's tariffs resulted in a reduction in aggregate U.S.
real income of $1.4 billion per month in deadweight losses, and cost U.S.
consumers an additional $3.2 billion per month in added
tax.
Per Reuters, as
of January 19 of this year, Tariffs imposed to restructure U.S. top trade relationships
have cost American companies $46 billion since February 2018, and U.S. exports
of goods hit by retaliatory tariffs have fallen sharply, according to an
analysis of Commerce Department data.(about 23% by the most recent estimate!)
All this, so far, was
predicted by most economists in advance. The big “gotcha” was that China, facing
increased soybean costs, found another supplier (predominately Brazil) instead
of buying the higher priced US crop. So
far, (and it will continue) The US Government has spent an unbudgeted $28
billion in aid to struggling farmers. Since the inception of these tariffs, tariff collections, which Trump assured would exceed costs, have lagged
pitifully, setting the stage for one of two eventualities.
Either 1) We
continue spending an “extra” $16 billion annually to offset losses, or 2) Trump
admits he’s an economic dunce and rescinds the tariffs. Don’t hold your breath.
The second and possibly
even more egregious issue is Trump’s openly courting the votes from mobs
clamoring for what every single rational medical expert I’ve read, or heard an opinion
from, says is an ill-advised relaxing of social distancing guidelines. Looking
at the gun toting mob on the Michigan State House steps was bad enough. Reading
various “Tweets” supporting these malcontents, from an imbecile who apparently cannot
control either his mouth or his thumbs, was sickening. A state governor acting
in compliance with federal guidelines should never have to fear the president’s
contravention of their action.
So, as you knew it would be, this week’s winner is The
Cheetoh in Chief.
