"You can't make this s**t up"

Candid comparison of 2016 primary debate topics

Democrats:

1. Race: (improving relations, decreasing tensions and incidents )  

 2. Campaign Finance reform/Citizens United:  (reducing ability of the uber rich to influence elections)

3. Domestic surveillance: ("too much of a good thing is bad, probably illegal, and maybe unconstitutional")

4. Wall Street Reform: (prevent continuing erosion of  {originally bi-partisan} post crash Financial Markets'  regulations)

5. Income Inequality: (Top 1%  control 90% of  nation's wealth. Is that a good thing?)

6. College affordability: ( crushing debt load on graduates hurts economy)

7. Diplomacy: ( improve relations overseas, Iran, elsewhere )

8. Paid family leave: (like every other developed nation)

9. Healthcare: (improve, like every other developed nation)

10. Insurance: ( goes with healthcare, drug costs)

Republicans:

1. Penis size allegations and response: (Does the Donald have a  widdle dick?)

2. Trump University: (D- rating, forced to discontinue "university" name) he defends/they attack

3. Abortion: (they're  against it, except for Trump)

4. Immigration/Wall with Mexico: ( myriad reasons, vast majority of "economic" ones invalid and incorrect)  

5. Taxes on high earners: (reducing them, making top 1% better off, rest of us sucking wind)

6. Lying: (everyone accuses everyone else)

7. Healthcare: (repeal the ACA, deprive 11 million newly insured of healthcare coverage)

8. Religious freedom: ( misnomer, actually should be called religious intolerance enabling act(s)

9. Emancipation Proclamation's legality: (Trump apparently believes slavery wasn't such a bad idea after all)

10. "Returning" Government land to states: (Cruz, et al promising to give states land which was never theirs in the first place, in exchange for votes)